I’ve always wanted to be a writer but I always thought it was unreachable, unrealistic, just a big dream. Then again I was also one of those kids that had many big dreams and I always pursued them, except the writing one. I don’t know why, I guess when it came to dreams that was the one I did not want to fail at and I figured if I never tried I could never fail.
So I pursued the dream of become a rockstar instead. You can imagine how that turned out, practically growing up on a stage with a guitar in hand. Lets just say it was fun while it lasted and it lasted longer than I could hope but after a good few years of partying, neglecting my studies and just losing track of the end goal, it was time to let go.
There was something else I need to do. Write. I knew this in the deepest darkest parts of my soul. And the funny thing is that every career I thought I could possibly see myself doing for the rest of my life fundamentally consisted of writing.
I went to university with the intent on becoming an entertainment and music journalist, but even then I knew that my music obsession would eventually fade. And when I was finally finishing my last few credits at the beginning of this year I realised that I would not be able to live with myself if i did not at least try.
The last year has been a year of trying to figure things out. My mother tried to pressure me into teaching and so I taught for a week. I think that was the turning point for me, the moment I realised that I needed to write, so I quit the teaching job and decided to search for a job that could go hand in hand with my dreams of one day becoming a published writer. I found a job as a digital marketing intern at a social media training company and started a blog focusing on my passion – that is reading and writing young adult fiction and speculative fiction.
The point that I’m trying to get to is that writing is hard. It is hard because it is often viewed as an unrealistic career path and most people won’t take you seriously unless you’re published. But that’s okay – haters gonnna hate.
Writing is hard because it is so easy to get discouraged by others and more importantly by ourselves. We are constantly battling with the fear that we’re not good enough, nor will we ever be. That was the one reason I did not want to try, I feared failure. But how are we ever going to become good enough unless we write everyday? Whether it’s a hundred words or a thousand words a day, it doesn’t matter as long as we keep writing. The key is working on our craft. It is worth it. Everyday I get to live more lives than most through my writing and that is enough to keep me going, though I wouldn’t quit my day job just yet.
I’ll end my rambling with a question for you.
Why do you write?
When you doubt yourself and your writing remind yourself why you’re doing this.